Friday 9 May 2008

the joke climate changes

A few months ago I wrote an article for Intelligent Life asking why there were no jokes about climate change. The largest A-Z joke book at the local Waterstones didn't have a single entry for 'climate change' or 'global warming' or 'environment' or 'earth' or 'planet'.

'This is our future,' the article said, 'rivers dry up, sea levels rise, animals become extinct--and there won't be a single blonde joke, or lightbulb joke, or three-men-walked-into-a-bar joke about any of it.'

To get things going (there had to be one entry) I came up with a lightbulb joke.

Q: How many climate sceptics does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. It's too early to say if the lightbulb needs changing.

In yesterday's Guardian there was another article asking why there were no jokes about climate change. As a sidebar, they printed the best of the eco-gags. There were six of them. This lightbulb joke was one of them.

If that doesn't prove there's a shortage, nothing does, but things are changing. The lightbulb joke was picked up by Hot Topic and linked to by Deltoid. People are now posting new lightbulb jokes of their own. Dozens of them. My favourite so far:

Q: How many climate sceptics does it take not to change a lightbulb?
A: Approximately 100. One to say that the current absence of light is the result of natural solar cycles and the other 99 to disseminate this finding through their 'science organisations' and oil industry funded think tanks.

The variety of the responses gives an idea of the number of points that can be made with a single lightbulb joke. Here's a pared-down selection:

Q: How many climate sceptics does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None. It's more cost-effective to live in the dark.
A: None. We only know how to screw the planet.
A: None. Changing lightbulbs is for engineers.
A: None. Eventually the lightbulbs will right themselves.
A: First we need more research and we need more research about what that research will be.
A: I can't hear you! I can't hear you! I can't hear you!

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